Like it or not, clothes make the man — and gangsta style feeds stereotypes

Approve of it or not, in this hyperspeed culture people make instant assumptions, instant judgments.

If you favor short skirts, fishnet stockings and stilettos, you probably can expect that your virtue will be suspect. If you're the guy wearing shorts, flip-flops and a Metallica T-shirt every day, your bosses probably aren't thinking "management material" unless, of course, you happen to work for Metallica.

So when young men complain of profiling, racial or otherwise, based on their drooping trousers and triple XL T-shirts, I have to wonder what exactly is the impression they want to make when they get dressed every morning.

If you dress like a thug, it shouldn't be too much of a surprise when you're treated like a thug. Isn't it hypocritical to demand respect for who you are when all we can see is a personal style made infamous in prison and among ex-convicts? That this is the group of people with whom you identify?

In a split-second meeting, it's hard to see the person beneath the clothes. And if people don't like what they see, they're not likely to take time to get to know you. A sentiment as shallow as it is true.

I witnessed this recently with my 21-year-old stepson, who has been sporting the oversize look since I met him eight years ago. When I tease him about it, he shrugs and says, "That's the style."

He's been trying to get a second, part-time job recently but is having trouble getting past the turning-in-the-application stage at local big-box stores.

"They don't even try to get to know me, to see who's turning in this application," he complained to his father. I held my tongue and silently contemplated what harassed managers at high-turnover businesses must see when he rolls in with his application.

First, he never travels anywhere alone. He moves about town with at least a couple of friends in tow. They all dress the same, with pants belted low — all the better to expose their boxer shorts — enormous white T-shirts and even whiter shoes, a ball cap on their heads at all times.

He has a multicultural group of friends, and they'd look like a carefully cast Coca-Cola commercial if not for the scowling expressions they share, because they'd like you to believe they're a tough group that shouldn't be messed with.

Now, I know that these are hard-working young guys, most of them working one or two jobs in addition to taking college classes, a tightly knit group who look out for one another.

But if I was a prospective employer, I'd see the guy in baggy prison-style pants who would have a gaggle of sullen dudes visiting him at work every day — not the image you most likely want for your local Best Buy.

We're supposed to believe that the United States is a classless society, yet even a kindergartner probably can tell you which group of kids is the cool one, the rich one, the goth one, the punk one. Since the beginning of time, a person's garb has delineated which social class he or she belongs to. I bet there was a group of cave women who wore only mink wraps, when everyone else did the best they could with bristly wolf fur.

Most adults should remember that once they, too, wanted to fit in with a specific crowd. That the easiest way to grab a share of the group identity, to celebrate a favorite athlete, musician, actor, whomever, was through certain types of clothing. Remember those days — were you a greaser, a punk, a preppy? — and perhaps we'll judge the baggy-clothed boys a little less harshly.

Most people want us to think they have an edgy side — it seems like at least six out of 10 suburban moms have a tattoo somewhere on their bodies. But in the long run, it's probably in your best interest to only hint at your wild, lawless side rather than to assume that identity from head to toe.

So if you don't want to be identified as a hooker, give up the short skirts and stilettos (or pair them with opaque tights and tunic top and look as if you've stepped out the pages of Vogue). If you want a management job, put away the Metallica T-shirt (or wear it under a well-tailored suit and be known as the ironically cool manager).

And if you want people to know you're not a thug, pull up your pants and lose the scowl.

After all, the true thugs don't seem to be worried that they're being treated like thugs. At least, they're not writing letters to the fashion editor about it.