Juju men, no; what about Juju Fruit?

Pele, Maradona and Baggio were once marked men at the World Cup. This year it's Juju.

The Confederation of African Football has banned juju men — traditional African healers who help their teams win by putting hexes on opponents and scattering charms on the playing field and potions on the goalposts — from teams' official entourages at this year's tournament.

"They are throwing out the baby with the bath water just because some soccer administrators wish to appease the white man more than honor African culture," the Los Angeles Times quoted one traditional healer from Swaziland.

"To depart for an international competition without consulting or including sorcerers is akin to going to an exam without a pencil," chimed in African Soccer magazine.

"Image is everything," the African federation said. "We are no more willing to see witch doctors on the (field) than cannibals at the concession stands."

So first dog gets yanked off restaurant menus, and now there's no cannibals allowed in the popcorn lines. What's a guy gotta do to get a bite around this place?

Don't lend him your ear

A gay-rights demonstrator in Memphis, Tenn., got a surprising champion for his cause Sunday: Mike Tyson.

"I was shouting, 'Stop homophobia,' and holding up my sign, and then he just came up and hugged me and said he wasn't homophobic," Jim Maynard, vice chair of Equality Tennessee, told The Commercial Appeal.

"I was totally shocked. I didn't really know what to do. So I just posed with him and smiled for the cameras. It's a step in the right direction."

Tyson, in town to fight Lennox Lewis on Saturday, signed 20 autographs and, taking a bite out of Yogi's book, declared, "Listen. Listen. I'm not homophobic, so if I use a homophobic term ... I'm not homophobic."

Boob-tube test tube

With the news that MTV has renewed "The Osbournes" for another season, Chris Dufresne of the L.A. Times has a wish list of other reality shows he'd like to see:

• "The Cansecos: Oliver Stone follows the former big-league slugger as Canseco searches for conspiracy theories that led to his finishing 38 home runs shy of 500.

• "The Tillmans: Main character walks away from the NFL to join the Army, returns home on furlough looking like Rambo.

• "The Cubans: In first episode, camera crew spends entire first week trying to find Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban in his spacious mansion.

• "The Barkleys: Episode I: Kids beg dad to retell story about that time he tossed a midget through a window.

• "The Jacksons: Uh-oh. The girlfriend's dad is coming over to dinner to discuss extending Robert Horry's contract."

Couching his options

If baseball is looking for a second opinion on contraction, Pat Riley is in favor of a good shrink once in a while.

"I want control," Riley told HBO's Bob Costas. "I'm a control freak. It costs me about $160 an hour every now and then to deal with that aspect of my life."

Go back to sleep

Daredevil Evel Knievel, when asked by Sports Illustrated what it was like to be in a coma: "How the ... do I know? I was in a coma."

— Dwight Perry, The Seattle Times