Bobby, call it a Knight on sympathy search

Bob Knight hit the airwaves again - this time on CNN's "Larry King Live" Wednesday night - and if he was trying his hand at garnering sympathy, he didn't even budge the needle on the Kleenex meter.

On Indiana President Miles Brand, who fired him: "I'm disappointed that I stayed at Indiana for five years under a president like Brand." (This is called taking personal responsibility.)

On the "zero-tolerance" policy the Hoosiers imposed upon him: "Does that mean one technical foul? Zero means zero. I thought that probably was something that I had to avoid." (Bingo, Bobby - er, Coach Knight.)

On his dismissal after 29 years as IU coach: "All they had to do is say, `We don't want you as a coach any longer.' Just tell me you don't want me here, and we avoid a lot of stuff." (Earth to Bob: On Sept. 10, they said they don't want you as coach any longer.)

Hit the 'roids, Jack

The top 10 signs an Olympic athlete is using steroids, courtesy of David Letterman's "Late Show":

10 - Sets world record for throwing an IOC drug tester.

9 - During anger-fueled roid rage, Al Trautwig knocked cold with pommel horse.

8 - After losing 100-meter dash, turns green, bursts out of clothing and screams, "Hulk mad!"

7 - At press conference, tearfully thanks mom, dad, wife and dealer.

6 - His medal count: 6 gold, 4 silver, 3 bronze, and the Guinness award for World's Biggest Freak.

5 - Last discus throw broke a window on the Mir space station.

4 - Left biceps is being considered as site of 2008 Olympics.

3 - Future plans: run for governor of Minnesota.

2 - His personal trainer: Robert Downey, Jr.

1 - He begins triple jump in Sydney and lands in Perth.

Not so hot in Hotlanta

A couple ears of corn sound tasty? Don't bother stopping in for a bite at Evander Holyfield's New South Grill north of Atlanta.

It has been KO'd. Fulton County marshals served eviction papers Wednesday.

"We never had the business," said John Akhile, the restaurant's chef and general manager, despite the fact it was located between two office towers.

Meanwhile, Thomas Jorgensen, property manager for the restaurant's landlord, is complaining about a long count. He says he hasn't seen a rent payment in three months.

Up for grabs again

News flash: The ball Wilt Chamberlain used to score a record 100 points in a game in 1962 has been ruled legit and is back on the auction block. It sold for $551,844 in April, but the sale was nullified when the ball's authenticity was questioned.

Kerry Ryman, who as a teenager pilfered the ball and fled the arena in Hershey, Pa., says he feels vindicated after about a dozen witnesses provided affidavits backing his version of the events.

"After Wilt scored 100, the referee stopped the game and threw the ball to Wilt," Ryman said. "He bounced the ball on the floor, and I grabbed it."

Now he'll take the money and run.

- Dwight Perry, The Seattle Time.