Swear Oath Of Loyalty To Ballard? Ya, Sure, You Betcha!

Eaters of something called lutefisk, and notoriously bad drivers to boot, Ballard residents have long been the butt of jokes from the hipper-than-thou.

Nevertheless, about 40 people renounced hipness, raised their right hands and declared their fealty to Ballard yesterday, taking their oath to the strains of Norwegian folk music at the annual Ballard Seafoodfest.

Following the lead of a familiar-looking bald man, they recited: "I pledge my allegiance to the Community of Ballard and to the Scandinavian heritage which it claims. One Community serving everyone, with lutefisk and driving lessons for all."

Then they all screamed, "Ya sure, you betcha!"

Comedian John Keister, host of KING-TV's "Almost Live," who administered the oath, praised Ballard as perhaps the last corner of Seattle unaffected by the invasion of corporate monsters. "You still have some buildings here that haven't been torn down to make room for World Wrapps," he said.

Keister said afterward he felt an obligation to appear at the annual festival "because Ballard has provided such a rich vein of material for our show."

He said that in appreciation, the show would declare a moratorium on Ballard jokes for a while - at least while they're in reruns.

Those in the crowd said, with straight faces, that there's lots of reasons why they would swear allegiance to Ballard.

Because it is their home, they said. Because it a place that still seems like the Seattle of old. That is, until Taco Del Mar recently opened on Ballard Avenue Northwest, said Margo Johansson.

Her husband, Kurt Johansson, waxed nostalgic. "You used to be able to have a good fight in Ballard without the police bothering you," he said.

"And you can still get a good Bloody Mary at Hattie's Hat at 6 a.m.," he added, referring to a locally-revered hangout.

"I think the reason why Ballard gets a bad rap is the lutefisk," said their friend, Roger Knudson, speaking of the Norwegian dish in which dried fish is soaked in lye water, skinned, boned and boiled. `It's the most glorious thing in the world. I wish I had some right now."

So how do they explain the notorious driving? Why do Ballard drivers seem always to be driving straight ahead, block after block, with their left turn signal blinking?

There's a good reason, Knudson explained: "It fakes everybody out. Nobody knows what's going on.

"Besides," he said, "you only burn out one bulb that way."