All That `Baywatch' Beauty Is Not For Real

Admit it. Even if you're not a "Baywatch" buff, even if you groan at the show's threadbare plots and gratuitous, slow-motion jogging scenes, it's hard not to secretly covet the varnished, sun-kissed looks of cast members Pamela Anderson Lee, David Hasselhoff, Yasmine Bleeth and the rest.

Well, there's hope for all you closet lifeguard wannabes. During a recent interview with "Baywatch" makeup artist JoAnna Connell, we learned some encouraging news. It seems that certain parts of those Malibu guys' and babes' anatomy are not, ahem, real.

Take their luscious, glowing . . . suntans. You can have them.

"That beautiful `Baywatch' tan you see on all those people is faux," Connell confesses. "We actually use sunless tanning lotion with a body stain. Anybody could have a tan like we have."

For 14 hours a day, five days a week for the past eight years, Connell, 42, has rubbed down and toweled up that hard-bodied crew. She has slathered Hasselhoff with suntan lotion and spritzed Bleeth with mineral water. She has camouflaged tattoos, and, yes, even disguised stretch marks.

Over the phone from California, she dished about some of the cast's beauty secrets. The best part is you don't have to be in Malibu to use them.

Connell has been in the Hollywood makeup business for 20 years, working on TV series ("China Beach"), movies ("Father of the Bride") and talk shows ("Rolonda"). The daughter of a schoolteacher and a computer analyst, she got hooked on cosmetics when a friend urged her to take a two-year cosmetology program at UCLA.

She has been with the "Baywatch" gang since the show debuted in 1989 and, above all, is a sunscreen stickler. She says the crew goes through gallons of lotion - 80 bottles every two months.

When the actors arrive on the set at 5:30 a.m., Connell initiates their daily "skin regimen." Faces are dabbed with Ephocyn moisturizer and eye cream. Wrinkles and other flaws are filled in with Ephocyn Essence: "It's like an oil that penetrates right into the skin. Where you would put it is where the fine lines are around the eyes, forehead, around your mouth and the neck."

Then Donna D'Errico and the rest are shellacked with a healthy coat of sun protection, minimum SPF 15.

But the protection doesn't end there. Their hair is sprayed with a sunscreen mist, too - especially artificially lightened hair because "color-treated hair will oxidize quickly. It turns white and you get breakage - the equivalent of a sunburn."

You know all those leisurely jogs on the beach and lounging around the lifeguard stand? Connell says most of the cast wouldn't be caught dead just sunning themselves.

"In between shots we provide umbrellas for them, and they wear robes. One of our actors, Traci Bingham, is so careful about not getting a burn, she even wears gloves."

Here's how the "Baywatch"-ers use tan-in-a-can without turning a frightful shade of orange: "Use round circular motions from the front of your thigh to the back part of the thigh. To get it to look good, you have to really rub it in, like you're giving a massage. Then let it go for a few days. Three days later, put another coat on."

The don'ts: "Never put one on after a hot shower. Sunless tanning lotion will grab and streak because your temperature is uneven. Wait for your body temperature to cool off." And "never add a lot of lotion to your knees, your feet, and under your arms because those are crevice spots that grab color quickly."

We've always heard that wearing makeup on the beach will turn you into a dried apricot. Not so, Connell says.

"I have no problem wearing makeup in the sun, preferably an oil-free base. I think it prevents lines and burning."

Dermatologist and Banana Boat sunscreen spokesperson Mary Lupo agrees that makeup is fine "as long as you have an SPF 15 underneath. Fairer people who have blond and red hair should wear a 30."

Most of the cast use pricey cosmetics by Bobbi Brown and Trish Mcevoy. But you don't have to spend a fortune to look like them: L'Oreal's Lash Out Waterproof Mascara (retail $6.25) is a "Baywatch" essential.