Porn Prefixes: Call Baiting?

Imagine this. You're a government employee and your assignment today is to call 80 phone numbers that may be associated with porno lines.

And, yes, you're getting paid for it. In fact, this is your - and my - tax dollars at work.

These numbers have 800 prefixes, but some of them appear to switch callers to 900 or other toll-charge numbers, not always with permission from the caller. They promise live conversations, but what consumers get instead are taped messages. Consumers also have complained about a billing procedure called "collect call back."

Some of the folks with 800 and 900 numbers use "caller ID" technology to capture the numbers of callers, then call them back collect, without permission.

But why should anyone care about "protection" for consumers who call such numbers looking for porn?

Because there are some rules even for this industry. Costs of pay-per-call lines must be prominently disclosed before charges begin. And if the advertisement promises a "live" conversation, it ought to be live, not taped.

Those are items you'll test for consumers who have complained to public watchdog agencies, including yours, the Federal Communications Commission.

So, wearing Uncle Sam's investigative hat, you pick up the phone and call. And call, and call. Several of the numbers you call are answered this way:

"Hello darlink. Thank you for calling . . . (the name of the company), where you can talk live to the big-breasted, beautiful, blond vimmin of Sveden."

Or:

"There you are, you naughty boy. This is your 800 mistress. Where HAVE you been? Are you ready, you snively little worm? For as little as $2.99 a minute . . ."

After some 80 calls like that, Kris McGowan, a member of the local Federal Communications Commission staff, called it a day.

She was one of two FCC staffers in the nation assigned to check nearly 100 lines with 800 prefixes, which taxpayers complained produce unwanted and unfair bills.

"I suppose if they got a live conversation for their money, that would be something," McGowan said. Then they might be getting what they paid for.

On one line McGowan said she was given a choice of three options: 1. Join a fraternity party in progress; 2. Join a lonely housewives group; 3. Indulge in recorded fantasies. McGowan, a Pacific Northwesterner, would have preferred skiing, sailing or traveling.

Though she never gave a credit card number or agreed to have her phone bill charged, she did hear some mysterious clicks during the investigative calls. In the past, consumers have reported that mysterious sounds on the line have meant they apparently were transferred to other lines, because the phone bills generated were not from numbers they called.

Some consumers have complained to the feds that they didn't agree to be charged and believed they were dialing toll-free 800 lines. McGowan's calls will provide a test.

One problem in such tests is that companies in the porn business know just what the traffic will bear.

About the time watchdog agencies have received enough complaints to detect a pattern of problems, the business modifies the way the lines work, adding required information about charges, that no one under 18 may make the call, etc.

So, boys and girls, be careful out there when you dial 800 or 900 lines. Or even the new 888 toll-free lines.

If you're gnashing your teeth about where your tax dollars went in this case, remember the FCC was following up on real people's complaints.

On another phone topic, if you are a pager user, be cautious about returning calls to unfamiliar area codes, especially 809, which includes Anguilla, Antigua, Bequia, Cayman Islands, Dominica, Dominican Republic, Jamaica, Montserrat, Mustique, Nevis, Palm Island, St. Kitts, St. Lucia, St. Vincent, Trinidad and Tobago, Union Island and the Virgin Islands. A number of consumers report they've returned calls to area code 809, only to find they get a taped message and a bill for $25. Before returning a call to an unfamiliar number, check the area code.

The less-than-honest folks are taking advantage of our ignorance of the mushrooming of area codes, and the assumption that every call we receive is a legitimate one to be returned. Not.

Shelby Gilje's Troubleshooter column appears Wednesday and Sunday in the Scene section of The Times. Do you have a consumer problem? Write to Times Troubleshooter, P.O. Box 70, Seattle, WA 98111. Include copies, not originals, of appropriate documents. Phone, 464-2262, fax 382-8873, or email address, sgil-new@seatimes.com