`Pontiac Moon' Unintentionally Loony

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X 1/2 "Pontiac Moon," with Ted Danson, Mary Steenburgen, Ryan Todd. Directed by Peter Medak. Alderwood, Crossroads, Everett 9, Factoria, Gateway, Lewis & Clark, Oak Tree, Uptown. "PG-13" - Parental guidance advised because of language. -----------------------------------------------------------------

Sometimes you can't judge a movie by its plot synopsis. Who could have guessed that "Proof," a story about a blind Australian photographer, would turn out to be one of the great moviegoing experiences of the 1990s?

More often, alas, things are exactly as they seem. For instance: "Pontiac Moon," a new road movie about a manic father (Ted Danson), his agoraphobic wife (Mary Steenburgen), their sensible 11-year-old son (Ryan Todd) and their cross-country race to Spires of the Moon National Park at the same time the Apollo astronauts are landing on the moon.

It's the summer of 1969, and dad wants the speedometer on his 1949 Pontiac Chief to read 238,857 miles - the distance between the earth and the moon - when they get to the park. That's right: Somehow he gets the notion that this "one perfect act" will reverse the downward spiral of his career (he's an inept schoolteacher) and marriage (his wife hasn't left the house in seven years).

The movie turns out to be every bit as foolish as that description sounds, but at least the writers are consistent.

Everyone, even the boy, eventually behaves just as dopily as absent-minded dad. Unfortunately, this is not a screwball comedy. It's supposed to be a heartwarming comedy-drama about a reuniting family.

The Hungarian-born director, Peter Medak, has made some striking British films ("The Krays," "Let Him Have It"), but when he works in the United States his projects rarely pan out.

One hopes he wasn't responsible for the cheesy visual effects or the insistent use of Randy Edelman's syrupy score - or the almost complete waste of acting talent that includes not only Steenburgen and Danson but Cathy Moriarty, who plays a barfly who tries to pick up Danson, and Max Gail, as Danson's long-lost brother.

The only actor who emerges unscathed is Todd, who almost makes you believe in the science-crazed boy - even when the script insists on having him mistake the Apollo spacecraft for a shooting star.